Fitness program review.

Well, we've already had a request for a review of a fitness program. Knowing the person who made the request, I'm sure it was made with tongue planted firmly in cheek. No matter! I said I'd take requests, so this request I shall honor! Today we look at...

Mario Lopez's Knockout Fitness!


Brief review for those in a hurry: $26.95 worth of utter garbage.

O.K., maybe that was a little harsh. Judging from the reviews on Amazon, nine people found it worthwhile enough to give it at least four stars. These are the same nine people that would find value in a book that told you smoking was bad for you, but only if it was "written" by a celebrity.

Let's trash the publisher's write-up first:

Ready to achieve that toned, hard body you've always wanted and have fun while doing it? No, I want to be sloppy and fat. I hate questions like this. Start your knockout fitness journey with expert Mario Lopez and gear up for results. "Expert?" Says who? He's an actor and a dancer! Yes, he's in good shape and his bodyfat is low. That does not mean he's an expert at anything. Oh, and in case you were curious, Mario's co-author was also the co-author for LL Cool J's Platinum Workout, The Powerfood Nutrition Plan, and The Jump Off: 60 Days to a Hip-Hop Hard Body.

Mario’s cutting-edge workout program provides easy-to-use, enjoyable methods for sculpting muscle, melting fat, and looking great. Unique exercises will keep you focused in and out of the gym, and creative meal plans will satisfy. You'll also learn the value of endurance activities like dancing, swimming, and running; discover 10-minute tone-ups and tips for a healthier lifestyle; and begin the quest for a better you in three simple, proven phases. Oh, you mean if I eat reasonably healthy food and stay physically active I'll he healthier and I'll look better? WOW!

This innovative three-phase program is a refreshing alternative to dull, old-school workouts. Regardless of your fitness level, current weight, age, or gender, Mario's program will:

-Help you burn fat and build muscle

-Quickly transform and tone your body

-Show you how to keep your new form—forever

Unlike many of the get-fit-quick plans out there today, Mario's program makes no false promises—he simply shows you how to get your desired results and keep them for life. If you want a program that works and includes visible results, then Mario Lopez's Knockout Fitness is a must. Guess what, snookums? ANY fitness plan will work if it is based on the following concept: EAT LESS AND EXERCISE MORE. Remember high school physics? Remember the first law of thermodynamics? You cannot create nor destroy energy...if you burn more calories than you consume, you will lose weight! If this doesn't happen, nobody will care because we're all going to be too busy rewriting the known laws of science.

So enough of the easy pot-shots. Is this book a total waste of money? I'd say yes unless you're lifestyle is focused on PopTarts. If you have never ever seen exercise being done, done exercise yourself, talked about exercise, or read about exercise, you might get something from this. Still, a just under $27 it's a lot to pay for ultra-basic information.

Oh, wait. I forgot. Mario Lopez is on TV. Everything he says is right. Give him all your money and do everything he says.

pfffft!